Cruising to Alaska 101

So let me tell you about cruising to Alaska. I'm a good person to tell you about such things because I just returned from an Alaskan cruise, and that makes me something of an expert in this day and age.

That would be beef medallion with almond croquettes. Ooh la la!

The first thing you need to know about cruising to Alaska is that you will be surrounded by food all the time. The buffet? Open 24 hours. Need some ice cream, pizza, or a hamburger? You can get any of those starting at 11:00 am and yes, its all-you-can-eat. What if you're like me and have a weakness for warm cookies? Never fear--the cafe is churning them out all day and they're just sitting there for you to take. And you can take AS MANY AS YOU WANT. You could even pile two or three on a plate of other pastries you just ordered from said cafe--mousse, fruit tarts, tortes, etc. Really. Make sure you're not too stuffed by dinnertime, because that meal will come in a variety of courses and you can order as much as you want. Two appetizers? Don't mind if I do! Don't forget that dinner menus will be fancy wicked awesome--beef tenderloin, lobster tail, wild mushroom cream soup, and that doesn't even include the desserts. OH. MY. WORD.

My dessert(s) from dinner one night

The second thing you need to know about cruising in Alaska is that no matter how many mornings you go to the "Health Club," you will still likely gain 5 lbs. or so...for the reasons listed above (i.e. cake, cookies, ice cream, hamburgers, pizza, etc.). The fact is that if you don't drink or gamble, eating will be your main form of entertainment all week long.

A view from The Promenade of wet, chilly, wonderful Ketchikan, AK!

The third thing you need to know about cruising to Alaska is that it will likely be cold at some point in your vacation or even for all of your vacation. Even if you cruise in the middle of the summer, you need to bring layers. I brought a coat and a variety of sweatshirts, sweaters, and jackets. And let me tell you--I was glad. Especially on the day Allie and I "promenaded" around Deck 7 (i.e. The Promenade) for a mile in cold and windy temperatures. BRISK! That's the word for it.

Our small, delightful, tour group in front of the Mendenhall Glacier.

The fourth thing you need to know about cruising to Alaska is that a lot of those EXCURSIONS they offer aren't going to be worth the crazy prices. However, if you can take an excursion that puts you in a small group of 13 people it will be a great escape from the THOUSANDS you're "living" with on the ship. And if that excursion actually gets you out in the real Alaska--outside of the kitschy shops and tourist traps and places hawking Sarah Palin ulu knives--and you can see the beauty and awesomeness of glaciers, forests, and huge mosquitoes? Then its worth it. And you'll be really glad you go. Even for $79.

Yeah. We're hot.

The last thing you need to know about cruising to Alaska is that it will be AWESOME. You'll get to see glaciers and whales and sea otters. You'll get to relax, read lots of great books, sit in hot tubs, watch lots of Matt Damon movies ("He is such an attractive man!"--Allie O.), try new foods and eat your heart out if you like that sort of thing. (I do.) Cruising to Alaska will be extra fabulous** if you go with your amazing parents and little sister. You'll have good times--eating, playing SkipBo, looking at Ice, keeping an eye out for the Milk & Cookies guy, and talking about life and all sorts of good things (Except the w-----g because that's an off-limits topic...). Really, its just going to be a grand ol' time.

Chillin' with my Homegirl, Sarah P.

So, you should do it. Go. Cruise. See Alaska. Eat more than you should. Buy a Sarah Palin bottle opener. Become good friends with Natasha at the ice cream counter. Work out in the "Health club" (Because you haven't lived until you keep your balance on a treadmill at 6 mph while your ship is a-rockin' and a-rollin' beneath your feet...). Take a hike through the Tongass National Forest. Find the Milk & Cookies guy. Shop in kitschy tourist shops. Try lobster tail. Hang out in the "No Kids Allowed" hot tub. Sleep in. Order shrimp cocktail with every meal. To sum up: Have a blast. Because really--you will.

And because I want to, a few more pictures!

Waving at the camera with a view of the Glacier in the background. This was just before I was attacked by a MASSIVE mosquito.

Wondering why the Milk & Cookies guy won't come back...

Allie and Mom in front of our cruise ship. Its HUUUUGE!

One of my favorite parts of the cruise--fresh cookies. Whenever I wanted them. Which was often.

Thanks to my awesome family for a great time!!

**The only thing that could make your cruise to Alaska even better would be if your truly stellar fiancee gets to come along for the week. I don't have a lot of experience in this area, so I'll leave it at that. I do know that if he doesn't come along, you'll probably miss him buckets. But you'll survive. {"Pat, Pat. You'll be fine."--Mariah S.}